Mistaken Identity
by Aiselne Phoenix Nocturnus
Summary: Mayhem ensues onboard the Durandal when MOMO accidentally overhears, and misinterprets, Jr. confess something VERY startling about him and 'Gaignun.' Two-Shot.
1. Part 1

_**Mistaken Identity**_

**SUMMARY**: Mayhem ensues onboard the _Durandal_ when MOMO accidentally overhears, and misinterprets, Jr. confess something VERY startling about him and Gaignun.

**GENRE**: Humor/General  
**RATED**: PG-13 / T  
**NOTABLE CONTENT**: Brief Alcohol Usage, Language, and Sexual Humor/Themes  
**PAIRING(S)**: Contains minor mentions/hints of Rubedo/Nigredo and Jr./MOMO

**COPYRIGHT NOTE**: I don't own _Xenosaga_

**STORY TAKES PLACE IN**: Six months after _Xenosaga: Episode II – Jenseits von Gut und B__ö__se_ (most likely during _Xenosaga: A Missing Year's_ timeframe)

**COMMENTS**: Hehe, here's another one of my U.R.T.V. comedies, except this time starring Jr. and Gaignun. This was originally meant to be a one-shot, but I found it a bit _too_ long (especially if you're like me and read a chapter/one-shot in one sitting). Thus, I cut the fic into two parts to make it easier for people to read (and digest).

For the record, this story isn't a true-blue yaoi fanfic, but there are slashy/cest implications as you'll eventually see. This is also going to have a bit more hints of Jr./MOMO-ness than any of my previously published works, solely because I'm also a sucker for those two. So sue me. Still, this story really doesn't have any 'dominant' pairings, primarily because full-blown romance was not the intention here. Still, you'll find plenty of hints/implications (even a few _extra_, briefly mentioned, pairings not listed above. I'll leave you readers to pick them out ^_-).

I'm not sure if this story is as funny as my previous U.R.T.V. comedy, "You Count Sheep, I'll Count to Ten." However, I'll admit this specific story was _very_ hard to write _without_ incorporating angst/drama. Alas, when writing a fic that involves a few legitimate death connotations, it's _very_ difficult to keep the atmosphere light (and I'm certainly _not_ going to poke fun at the alluded deaths, either). Thus, this story has been dubbed another one of my Humor/_General_ fics, with a balance of comedy and seriousness.

Lastly, for the random record, I _love_ Alby! That dog is so freakin' cute! ^_^ Enjoy and please review.

* * *

_- Special thanks goes out to The Original Oxymoron for proofreading this story! -_

**Mistaken Identity**

_Aiselne Nocturnus_

**PART 1**

"Damn Gaignun," Jr. snarled angrily under his breath as he stomped into his suite on board the _Durandal_. The moment the door to his room slid closed behind him, the enraged redhead tore off his carmine trench coat and chucked it onto the nearest chair. Exhaling a puff of exhausted air, Jr. ran a hand through his bangs alongside rubbing his sore temples. As if the presence of his room held such power, the red-haired U.R.T.V. suddenly felt his energy drained, and he barely trudged to the master bed before collapsing facedown into a pillow. Slightly suffocated, but too tired to move, Jr. laid idle, only moving his arms to grip the pillow in frustration when his youngest brother crept into his thoughts. "Leave it to _him_ to him to stick me with all _his_ crap while he's off doing God-knows-what! Nigredo's gonna' owe me _big time_ whenever he gets his ass back to the foundation!"

Until then, all Jr. could do at the moment was contend with the added responsibilities left in the wake of Gaignun Kukai's departure for Fifth Jerusalem. It had been around six months since the appearance of Abel's Ark, and more importantly, since Gaignun's disappearance. A recent transmission from the chairman stated that Gaignun was currently visiting Fifth Jerusalem for various 'government affairs.' Even Jr. did not know what these 'affairs' were, nor did he have the time to solve the recent mysteries regarding his youngest brother. With Gaignun away, Little Master's workload easily doubled to fill the chairman's absence. Between the paperwork, meetings with Miltian officials, and the regular overlooking of the _Durandal_, it did not take much to tucker Jr. nowadays. Even the redhead's seemingly-endless supply of energy occasionally ran low, especially during busy months like these without Gaignun around.

Fortunately, Jr. still had Mary and Shelley, and the Godwins were a tremendous help. In fact, it was _Mary_ who insisted Little Master take a much-needed break this afternoon before the redhead wore himself ragged. The Godwin sisters agreed to take charge on the bridge and Jr. fully trusted their capabilities. With the _Durandal _in safe hands, Jr. retired to the blissful comfort of his soft bed, nestling against its pillows and feeling a delighted smirk pull his lips.

Of course, the _real_ reason Jr. smiled was because he could not _wait_ for Gaignun to return. _Then_ the older brother could give his youngest sibling a _proper_ 'what-for,' _Makarovs and all,_ Jr. grinned sadistically to himself, noticing how his said weapons were still in their holsters and just _waiting_ to let off a few rounds. _Baby brother's gonna' DANCE when he gets home!_

Until then, Jr. took the current opportunity to savor his rest, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. Unfortunately, his nap did not come as quickly as he expected before a soft "Arf!" echoed through the bedroom. Knowing that familiar yip, Jr. turned his head to one side. At the same time, his blue eyes opened alongside another widening smile when he watched a blur of white jump onto the bed. Two seconds later, the redhead giggled as his face was bombarded with warm wet licks only a puppy could get away with. When the onslaught of dog kisses ceased, Jr. propped himself up on one elbow, wiping his wet face with the other arm before then patting the albino puppy's head.

"Hey, Alby," smiled Jr., scratching behind the pup's ears and causing Alby to affectionately lick his master's hand. Despite how Jr. craved sleep, Alby's visit definitely brightened the tired redhead's spirits. As the white pup energetically wagged his tail back and forth, Jr. chuckled again before flashing the dog a teasing look. "You' staying out of trouble?"

Of course, Jr. was well aware of how mischievous that innocent-looking pup could be. The droids, especially on the _Elsa_, could not stand Alby, since the dog was always causing trouble. Conversely, the _Durandal's_ 100-Series Realians _adored_ Alby and welcomed his presence on the bridge. Mary and Shelley never seemed to mind the puppy, either, and Jr. caught Mary playing with Alby in the park on a few of her breaks. Still, there was no denying that Little Master's dog tended to create mischief from time to time, just like his beloved owner.

Still, trouble or no trouble, Jr. loved that dog and gently stroked Alby's soft fur. Having a warm puppy next to him brought back very sweet, sometimes _bitter_sweet, memories of when he used to cuddle with another small, furry animal. Unlike Alby, the past animal was both white _and_ black, and was not a dog but a cat. To a young boy, there was something reassuring about nuzzling against a fluffy kitty cat, especially on cold nights. Plus, the companionship was a godsend on the 'cold' nights after an argument with his brother(s), which happened quite often in Rubedo's youth thanks to his lovely temper.

_Dammit_, Jr. missed that cat…even fourteen and a half years later.

- - - - - - -

MOMO had not visited the _Durandal_ since the Abel's Ark incident six months ago. Thereafter, she had been happily living with her mother and enjoying occasional surprise visits from Ziggy whenever he was given permission to leave the Kukai Foundation. The pink-haired Realian loved her cyborg guardian, but after six long months, MOMO wanted to see _all_ of her friends again. Due to Shion and Allen's busy schedule at _Vector_, MOMO was unable to visit them and KOS-MOS, so her next stop was the _Durandal_.

It had been about a half-hour since Ziggy picked her up from Fifth Jerusalem's spaceport and brought MOMO to the _Durandal_. Afterwards, the 100-Series Prototype giddily pranced off the Loop Line's orange shuttle and bounded for the red and white-painted corridors of the Residential Area. Skipping to an imaginary beat, MOMO's blue boots tapped rhythmically against the polished floors, while the white petal-like flaps of her sailor suit flowed behind her like wings. Occasionally, the pink locks framing her face and the ribbons from her beret tickled her cheekbones and broadened her jovial smile. MOMO almost forgot how much fun it was traversing the massive red dreadnaught, passing by the park and casino that contained various crewmembers and other 100-Series like her. There was a cheery aura encompassing the happy little Realian, causing other residents to smile and wave to the familiar girl.

She continued her trek to the residential suites, where Kukai members of the highest stature resided: Master Gaignun, the Godwin sisters, and Little Master. MOMO already knew Gaignun was away, while Mary and Shelley returned to the bridge after their brief welcoming of MOMO and Ziggy at the dock. It was thanks to Mary that MOMO headed for the chairman's suite, where the blonde woman claimed Jr. was currently resting. All MOMO planned on doing was poking her head into the room to see if Jr. was in there. If he was sleeping, she already planned on letting him rest, but if he was awake…

…She could not stop a line of blush that ran across her cheeks. If Jr. were _awake_, MOMO wanted to run into his arms, just like during the last time she was on the _Durandal_. The embracing duet would spin around a few times, and thereafter, MOMO's amber eyes would be able to meet with Jr.'s sapphire orbs. MOMO thought about those cerulean eyes quite often over the course of six months, but there was a difference between _thinking_ about them and actually _melting into_ them.

The daydreaming, red-faced Realian barely noticed the door to Jr.'s designated suite, causing MOMO's boots to skid to a halt before bypassing the room. Double-checking the room number, the sailor-clad Realian then swallowed as she absentmindedly stared at the shut door. She could feel her heart pumping quickly, her cheeks flush, and her body skittishly shift its weight. MOMO did not need her sensors or Realian capabilities to know why she was behaving this way. The reasons for her actions were quite obvious as her left hand lifted to her pounding chest. From there, MOMO's amber eyes peered down to the hand, where the designed gap in her blue sleeve unveiled the bracelet Jr. gave her. As if the charm were made of fragile glass, MOMO's opposite hand delicately covered the antique bullet, pressing it to her heart as her eyes shut rapturously.

_Jr.,_ the smiling Realian thought. _I missed you so much._

And she could not _wait_ to tell him such! With an elevated jolt of excitement, MOMO's eyes flew open enthusiastically before her hands separated. A part of MOMO wanted to burst into the room and immediately throw her arms around Jr. However, after being brought up, and programmed, as a polite young lady, MOMO restrained her impulsive emotions for modesty's sake. After all, Jr. _was_ the Kukai Foundation's leader, and he had an authority figure to uphold, especially in Mr. Gaignun's absence. MOMO did not want to jeopardize Jr.'s leadership position just because she could not control her unparalleled ecstasy of being able to see the redhead again. Such behavior would be _very_ inappropriate.

So instead, MOMO respectfully took off her blue beret, freeing her short pink hair from its confines. Holding the hat to her still-fluttering chest, MOMO took another deep breath, released it, and then raised a shaky finger towards the door's opening panel.

The only reason her finger never reached the button was because MOMO could have sworn she heard something…_inside_ the room. Blinking curiously, the Realian then paused before nearing her head closer to the door.

- - - - - - -

"This is nice, actually," Jr. had to admit, resting his head next to Alby's as the dog curled up beside its master. Continuously stroking the puppy's fur, a content smile found its way onto Jr.'s face as he felt various memories envelope him, thoughts specifically about one cat. "It brings back nice memories." Technically, it also brought back bittersweet memories, too, but Jr. came to realize a _long_ time ago that for every 'good' memory there was bound to be _one_ pint of bitter sweetness attached to it. The trick was learning how to accept and bypass the sad memories to embrace the happy ones. Such was a technique Jr. had been desperately attempting to master over the past six months, for more than _one_ reason.

As Alby's mouth widened with a silent yawn, Jr. softly chuckled when the albino rested its sleepy head on the bed's comforter. Delicately running his fingers along the dog's soft fur, Jr. felt as though somebody tossed him back in time fourteen and a half years ago. Back then, the scene would have starred Rubedo, looking almost identical to his current form except clad in a U.R.T.V. blue and gray uniform. The redhead would lie in bed, albeit a cot far less luxurious and fluffy than those purchased by the Kukai Foundation. The room Rubedo was situated in would also be less glamorous, and instead dark, bland, and cold.

But in the middle of the uninviting ambiance Rubedo would lay in his cot with a particular black and white kitty nestled beside him. The rest of his youth had been spent being trapped in the synthetic world of the Yuriev Institute. Yet, there was something very relieving about being in that institute whilst sleeping beside a real cat that emanated _true_ warmth in an otherwise 'cold' atmosphere. That cat was one of the few memories of Jr.'s past he actually recalled with a smile on his face.

The smile never lasted long, though, when Jr. recalled what eventually happened to that poor cat.

_Gaignun…_

But dammit, he did _not_ want to keep bogging himself down with such depressing memories. Heavens knew Jr. did _plenty_ of that throughout the past six months, and he was _sick_ of it! One could only mope around so long before he had to pick himself up and move on with his life. He had his chance to drown in sorrow once and Jr. refused it, so now he had to accept his choice and _live_.

So Jr. pushed away the unwanted memories and nuzzled his head closer to Alby's, noticing the puppy's eyelids had shut by now. It reminded Jr. of how he originally came into his room to take a nap, too, and he did not want painful memories to resurface in his dreams. Thus, he warded off the pain via thinking only warm, happy thoughts about his very first pet.

"Ya' know something, Alby?" Jr. rhetorically asked, though knowing the puppy was already napping and could not hear him. Still, since the dog would not be able to verbally reply when awake, Jr. just took another deep, relaxing breath, before continuing to talk to the pup. "This reminds me of when Gaignun and I slept together."

- - - - - - -

MOMO's beret barely made a sound when it hit the floor. Then again, everything throughout the _Durandal_ seemed to have gone mute as MOMO's eyes widened in unparalleled shock. Despite her inherent manners, the Realian's mouth hung open slightly, and her wide amber eyes stared off to nowhere as her highly advanced mind attempted to process what she just heard.

_…J-Jr.…and…Mr. Gaignun…SLEPT together?!_

No, no…that could not be right. MOMO just heard Jr. incorrectly, that was all. Manners aside, MOMO pressed her ear to Jr.'s bedroom door, focusing all of her Realian capabilities to listen inside and find a correction to Jr.'s statement.

- - - - - - -

"It was nice," Jr. smiled genuinely, enjoying one of the few peaceful memories of his otherwise hellish past. "Especially on cold nights. Gaignun would curl up beside me and I'd put my arms around him. We'd keep each other warm all night long."

- - - - - - -

MOMO's jaw practically hit the floor. "Oh my goodness…" she barely whispered, a shaky hand managing to cover her agape mouth. She could _not_ believe what her ears were hearing; she simply could _not believe it_! But there _had_ to be an explanation, right?! After all, Jr. and Gaignun were _brothers_, _right_?!

- - - - - - -

"He could always sense when I was sad, too," Jr. suddenly recalled, remembering quite a few occasions throughout his youth when he would be undergoing sorrow similar to now. "Gaignun would always come to me if I were upset about something. I'll bet…" he paused, biting his lip briefly before glancing away. "…If he were here today, he'd come to me right now and take this damn pain away. He'd probably jump right into this bed if he could."

- - - - - - -

A part of MOMO's heart went out to poor Jr., knowing he suffered very smarting emotional wounds lately. Alas, the _other_ side of her could not help but feel mortified, and a little disgusted. Yes, Jr. _was_ recuperating after a very painful milestone in his life, but…

_…That's NO excuse for Gaignun to take advantage of Jr.'s fragile state! I thought Mr. Gaignun was a compassionate man! How cruel can somebody be to 'jump right into bed' with someone who's undergoing pain?! Poor Jr.'s probably so vulnerable right now that he'll accept ANY consolation._

MOMO wanted to cry. If only she never left Jr. six months ago!

- - - - - - -

"But some nights I'd bring him to bed with me, too," continued Jr., particularity remembering a more pleasant memory that relit his smile and optimism. "He'd squirm a little, but heh, I knew he liked it. But usually, he'd crawl into my bed on his own, not that I ever minded. I always liked it, so I always allowed."

- - - - - - -

Just before her sympathetic tears could fall, MOMO's eyes blinked them away upon hearing that next tidbit of information. _Jr.…LIKED it?! He ALLOWED it?!_ Perhaps Jr. was not as innocent in this matter as MOMO originally thought. Yes, she was aware that Jr. was actually over twenty-six years old, even older than Gaignun, no less. MOMO understood that adults had, er, 'desires,' but…

_…To do…THAT…with his…BROTHER?!_

_No! No!_ MOMO could not believe it! Jr. may technically be a man but he was not _that kind_ of a man, MOMO was _sure_ of it! Then again, she never though Gaignun was _that kind_ of a man, either, especially since Mary and Shelley were always around him. Unless he went _both_ ways… What if Jr. was the _same_?! _Gack!_ Even MOMO, an advanced 100-Series Observation Realian, was getting so confused!

"MOMO? What are you doing?"

Shrieking like a surprised puppy, MOMO jumped in shock upon hearing the deep voice come out of nowhere. Due to her current, er, dilemma, MOMO's sensors never detected anyone nearby, which was probably how Ziggy managed to 'sneak up' behind her. Spinning around skittishly, the blue-clad Realian looked back up at her cyborg guardian, staring down at her with a nonchalant expression tinted with discreet curiosity and suspicion. Gulping soundly like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar, MOMO once again started shuffling her boots nervously.

"Um…I…uh…" stammered the pink-haired girl, chewing on her lip in between words. MOMO had no reason to keep secrets from Ziggy, but she wondered if she was at liberty to divulge what she just overheard. Then again, the cyborg _was_ a male, so maybe Ziggy could better understand, and ultimately _explain_, what the hell Jr. was talking about. MOMO _really_ did not want to believe the boy (well, _man_) she had been dreaming about for the past six months did _that_ with his own brother!

"Ziggy…" MOMO squeaked, suddenly feeling liquid stinging come to her amber eyes as they glanced up into Ziggy's blue orbs. She felt so confused right now, so unsure what to think about Jr. and Mr. Gaignun. The pink-haired Realian always assumed the brothers 'loved' each other, but…MOMO did not think it was _that kind_ of love! "Oh…I think Jr.'s been involved in something…" Dare she say it? "…Indecent!"

Naturally, the cyborg's first instinct was to blink. Of what emotion there _was_ on his face, Ziggy's expression minutely morphed from curiosity to perplexity. If he was still human, he might have exclaimed incredulously "_what_?!" However, the hardened solider inside Ziggurat 8 overrode any 'jumps to conclusion,' and instead kept his face neutral. "MOMO, what are you talking about?" Ziggy dared to ask.

The little girl did _not_ relish the responsibility of explaining Jr. and Gaignun's…er…was 'relationship' the word? Technically, just because people engaged in intercourse did not necessarily mean they were in a _relationship_ like MOMO's parents once were. There _were_ such things as 'one-night-stands,' and…_oh dear lord! _Why was she thinking this way?! Relationship or no relationship, having two brothers do…_that_ was categorized in MOMO's data banks as "wrong"! Well, technically it was categorized as "incest," but…_aaaaaahhhh!_ MOMO could not believe she had data on _that_! Learn something new everyday. Why in God's name did a 100-Series Realian (in a twelve-year-old's body, no less) need _that _kind of information in her data banks, anyway?!

Confused beyond belief, one of MOMO's hands held her throbbing head. It was very uncommon for a 100-Series Observational Realian to get _this_ bewildered. MOMO could effortlessly comprehend complex calculations and coordinates, but when it came to…_this_…MOMO was not built for _this_! "Oh Ziggy!" MOMO discreetly whimpered, confused and a little sad and scared at the same time. Lowering her palm from her head, MOMO noticed it happened to be her left hand, still showcasing the bracelet Jr. made her. She did not want to sound selfish, but…deep down, MOMO always hoped Jr. would be the kind of man to return her affections for him. Knowing he was _not_…

…Technically, even _that_ should not have mattered. Orientations aside, that did _not_ trivialize what Jr. and Gaignun did! The bottom line was that they were _brothers_, and according to MOMO's data, brothers should not do _that_! Besides, blood-ties aside, even if Jr. _was _technically the older brother...his body was that of a _twelve-year-old_! Gaignun's body was that of a..._twenty-six-year-old_! Twelve-year-olds and twenty-six-year-olds should _not _be doing those kinds of things together! MOMO did not think couples like that should even _date_...!

...And when she just realized _what _she said...MOMO wanted to cry again. If MOMO believed a twelve-year-old body should not have relations with a twenty-six-year-old, that negated any hopes she had of _her _being with Jr., did it not? _Jr...._

MOMO did not know _what _to believe anymore. "Ziggy…I…I just…" she stammered to speak, tripping over her words too clumsily for a 100-Series. Her head still felt like a merry-go-round. It spun faster and faster as _too_ many dirty mental pictures of Jr. and Gaignun started materializing in her imagination. _No! No!_ MOMO felt so naughty for thinking this way, even if the thoughts were against her will. As if she may explode, the pink-haired girl blurted out everything in one fast ramble whilst pointing to Jr.'s shut bedroom door. "I just overheard Jr. say he slept with Gaignun!"

Naturally, the 'hardened solider' side of Ziggy kicked in first. "MOMO, you should not be eavesdropping on people's conversations," the cyborg spoke matter-of-factly before shaking his blonde head. "You are picking up bad habits from Jr.-"

MOMO calculated that it took 2.07 seconds more before Ziggy's shaking head came to a sudden stop, as if the cyborg was frozen in ice for a moment. As MOMO's words sunk into his own data banks, Ziggy's eyes blinked a few times, processing what the little girl just told him. Technically, a vintage cyborg's data processing was not as efficient as a 100-Series Realian's, so Ziggy wondered if he misinterpreted the _rest_ of MOMO's sentence.

_Jr. and Master Gaignun…_ No, that could not be right. Ziggy must be malfunctioning, that was all, perhaps a side effect from life-extension experimentation. Damn life-extension must have been messing with his head. God only knew _what_ those half-assed doctors farted around with while he was under. Ziggy would have to report this problem to the SOCE come his next maintenance. Shaking his head to reassemble his thoughts, the blonde cyborg returned his gaze to MOMO, doing his damnedest to maintain his typically nonchalant demeanor.

"MOMO…" started Ziggy, taking a careful step closer to the equally confused Realian. "Are you…_positive_?" Technically, Observational Realians were rarely incorrect when they 'observed,' meaning if MOMO answered "yes" to Ziggy's question, then… _Oh God…_ Did Ziggy _really_ want MOMO to answer his question? "Are you certain you are not jumping to conclusions?" Frankly, Ziggy could only _hope_ they were jumping to conclusions. The old cyborg did not want to ponder _too_ deeply the possibility of Jr. and Master Gaignun…two _brothers_…doing…

"I'm _positive_, Ziggy!" MOMO swore, hopping once for emphasis. MOMO might be a young girl but she was mature enough not to goof around and say things like _that_ for no damn reason. The Realian was well aware of the severity within the topic she discussed, but…it was not like MOMO was _lying_, either. "I heard it with my own ears!" she declared, before waving a hand for Ziggy to come closer to the bedroom's shut door. Discreetly, the girl pressed her ear back against the cold metal, sending shivers through her little body. Jr. was still in there and still talking, encouraging MOMO to coerce Ziggy to join her and hear for himself. He was obviously not going to believe this seemingly ludicrous matter unless Ziggy heard Jr.'s words with his _own_ ears. "Listen!"

Ziggy was never a fan of eavesdropping, namely because such was downright rude. Plus, he knew the _Durandal_ was constantly under recorded surveillance, _especially_ near the chairman's suites. All Ziggy needed was for Jr. to unearth some video footage of the _old man_ eavesdropping and Ziggy would _never_ hear the end of it! Aside the fact, Ziggy doubted he wanted to hear the _type_ of conversation Jr. was having in there, especially if the topic involved him and Gaignun. Ziggy was a firm believer that whatever went on behind closed doors should _remain_ behind closed doors. "I'd rather not, MOMO."

Fortunately, and unfortunately, Ziggy did not _need_ his ear pressed against the door for his and MOMO's advanced ears to hear inside Jr.'s bedroom.

- - - - - - -

"It was always nice laying there with him," Jr. whimsically reminisced, still stroking Alby's head despite the pup had long since drifted to slumber. Even though nobody was listening to him (of what Jr. was aware of), the redhead enjoyed recalling his pleasant times with that black-and-white kitty. "When you're little, simple stuff cheers you right up. If I was sad, all Gaignun had to do to make me happy was give me a little kiss. Heh, of course, we called it a 'kiss,' though the way _he_ always did it was more or less him licking his tongue all over me," Jr. added, pointing a swirling finger across his face where the cat used to lavish him with affection. "God, I loved him."

- - - - - - -

At this point, Ziggy was almost hoping Dr. Mizrahi or _anybody_ would call and give the cyborg some death-defying task to perform…_anything_ to get away from _this_! "MOMO, you should _not_ be listening to this!" _I should not be listening to this, either!_ Ziggy declared, soundly stomping over to the appalled Realian and physically pulling her away from Jr.'s door. Too stunned to put up a fight, MOMO was easy to move, while Ziggy led her down the corridor. Ziggy learned many things throughout the hundred-plus years of his existence, but even he did not know how to handle this situation. His best, most legitimate solution was "What Jr. and Master Gaignun do together is their business."

What Ziggy said was absolutely correct. However, as reality sunk back into her, MOMO could not bring herself to simply leave the problem unsolved. True, there was no reason to assume there _was _a 'problem,' per se. Jr. clearly did not sound upset by what he and Gaignun did, so there was no reason to assume _anything _'indecent.' Jr. said it himself; he loved Gaignun, and he was obviously not ashamed. MOMO did not know Mr. Gaignun's opinion on the matter, but as long as Jr. was happy, MOMO was also happy.

For far too long, MOMO's happiness was Jr.'s top priority. She always wanted to return the favor to the protective U.R.T.V., but never knew _how_. Although she loved the gifts Jr. gave her, especially the bullet-charm bracelet, MOMO was not the type to lavish others with material presents. Besides the fact, MOMO doubted she could buy Jr. something he could not purchase with the Kukai Foundation's seemingly endless supply of money. Presents aside, MOMO was only a 100-Series Observational Realian. Though she was inherently smart, MOMO's battle skills were not up to par with a combat model Realian, never mind a military U.R.T.V. Thus, MOMO knew the chances of her 'helping' Jr. like he 'helped' her out of crises were slim. What _else_ could she do for him: rattle numbers and gate-jump coordinates for the rest of her life? Her cooking was nowhere near as perfected as Shion's, either, dubbing MOMO an average cook at the moment. MOMO was sure Jr. would appreciate _anything_ she did for him, but the Realian wanted to do something _extra_-special for her red-haired knight. She wanted Jr. to be happy.

But…Jr. _was_ happy. He and Gaignun were happy together, so who was MOMO to stop them? Yes, she…liked Jr...._very_ much, actually. In fact, MOMO liked him so much she was willing to step down for what _truly_ mattered to Jr. The girl could only wonder if what she thought and felt for Jr. was what Gaignun felt, too. Truthfully, MOMO would be lying if she said she was not a tiny bit sad to know Jr. would probably never feel for her the way he felt for Gaignun. Nevertheless, she refused to be selfish, especially after all the sweet things Jr. did for MOMO and her family over the years. Especially considering the tragic events of six months ago, never mind what happened to Jr. over fourteen years ago, how could MOMO _possibly_ deny him happiness?

The answer was simple: she would _not_ deny it. If Jr. and Gaignun were happiest together, MOMO would not interfere. In fact, she would do just the _opposite_! She would be _happy_ for them, and encourage _everyone _on the _Durandal_ to be _just_ as happy for Master Gaignun and the Little Master!

First things first, MOMO had to report this glorious news to Mary, Shelley, and the _rest _of the _Durandal_ crew!

**To Be Continued**

* * *

**A/N**: Hehehe, I'm sure you can see where this is going. If you ask me, situations like this where Gaignun Kukai and Gaignun the cat get mismatched are _long_ overdue! ^_^

I hope you're enjoying this so far. Feel free to read on or take a moment to post a review.


	2. Part 2

**COPYRIGHT NOTE**: I don't own _Xenosaga_

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Mistaken Identity

_Aiselne Nocturnus_

**PART 2**

A few hours later…

It was sixteen-hundred hours that afternoon on Fifth Jerusalem when Gaignun Kukai finally managed to take a momentary break. Dealing with Parliament easily zapped the black-haired man's strength, coercing him to practically collapse in the chair behind his new office's desk. Not a second later, his elbows slammed against the polished desk top, while Gaignun buried his face into his hands. Once again, he was plagued with another hellish migraine, throbbing so painfully his brain felt like it might explode from the pressure. He never bothered with painkillers, since the U.R.T.V. knew pills would not relinquish his peculiar pain. Gaignun knew what was _truly_ responsible for his lethargy and headaches, and _none_ of them had to do with the hectic dealings with Parliament.

_Damn Yuriev,_ cursed Gaignun, before shutting his teal eyes momentarily. Today had actually been one of Gaignun's "better days" regarding his little 'arrangement' with Dmitri. As of this hour, his father had yet to regain control of his son's mind, though Gaignun was not stupid enough to assume his freedom would last forever. Still, he savored every rare minute of being _himself_, and not Dmitri's puppet. During moments like these, Gaignun relished the opportunity to relax and be free of worry, free of noise…

_"Excuse me, Mr. Gaignun. You have a call on transmission line four."_

Knowing he spoke too soon, Gaignun lifted his head upon hearing the nonchalant secretary voice from the speakerphone resting across his desk. Exhaling in minute frustration and disappointment, Gaignun straightened up in his seat as the transmission's holographic screen flickered before him to display the incoming call. "Patch them through," he nodded, before the connection was made. Maintaining his typically serious, authoritative composure, Gaignun fixed his tie before clearing his throat to speak. "This is Gaignun Kukai speaking. Who may I say is calling?"

_"MASTAH' GAIGNUN!! HOW COULD YOU?!"_

Despite his rock-solid composure, the particular pitch in Mary Godwin's scream nearly surprised Gaignun enough to flip backwards in his seat. For starters, when the holographic image finally appeared before his eyes, Gaignun was treated to a _very_ up-close-and-personal shot of Mary's face. Her projected blue eyes were each the size of baseballs careening at Gaignun's head. The rest of her face was red in fury as the beautiful blonde now resembled a fire breathing dragon ready to barbeque her pathetic victim. If looks could kill, Gaignun would already be dead.

Regaining himself, Gaignun blinked a few times before minutely frowning strangely. With the oversized holographic image of Mary's face bearing down upon him, Gaignun could only dare ask, "What are you talking about, Mary?"

_"Oh, don't you play coy with me, mistah'!"_ Mary hotly countered like an overprotective mother, tearing her face back from the screen to unveil the rest of the _Durandal_ bridge behind her. Situated to Mary's left was Shelley, looking less obvious but as equally unsettled as her younger sister. Various 100-Series were also congregating around the camera, though none were looking directly at Master Gaignun. In fact, much to Gaignun's surprise, several powdery-blue-haired Realians were weeping into each other's shoulders.

Gaignun could only _imagine_ what the hell was going on back on the Kukais' dreadnaught. "What is going on?" he asked seriously, particularly disturbed by the crying 100-Series in Mary and Shelley's background. If Gaignun did not know better, he would have assumed something terrible happened. "What happened?"

_"You know EXACTLY what happened!"_ Mary blasted, pointing an accusing finger at Gaignun's screen. Of course, from _Gaignun's_ end, her finger looked like it might pop out of his screen and strangle him, just like in those Lost Jerusalem cartoons his older brother researched.

Speaking of Jr., Gaignun found it odd that his said brother was not on the bridge. Granted, he knew Jr. was busy filling in Gaignun's league of absence, never mind the fact that his impatient red-haired brother was rarely the type to sit still for very long. Knowing Jr., he was probably busy with Miltian officials, or screwing around in the _Durandal's_ casino (Gaignun was betting his money on the latter). Still, considering they had not spoken in a while, Gaignun figured Jr. would jump at the chance to converse with his little brother. Knowing Jr. was not available to chat did not make Gaignun 'sad,' per se, but he _did_ admittedly miss his older brother over the past six months.

The mysteries continued to pile up in Gaignun's mind. Where was Jr.? Why were the _Durandal's_ 100-Series sobbing uncontrollably? And why, for the love of God, was Mary looking at _him_ with that murderous glint in her eyes?! Gaignun had been away for six months, so what tiff could Mary possibly have regarding their absent master? A part of him wondered if this was not some ploy by the _Durandal_ crew to guilt Master Gaignun to come back home. _I wouldn't be the LEAST bit surprised if my brother's behind it, either,_ Gaignun suspected, before taking another breath to settle the women on screen. "Is this about my extended leave?"

"_I said stop playin' coy, Mastah' Gaignun!"_ repeated Mary, stomping her foot rather immaturely, causing the sister beside her to step to the side before Mary unintentionally stomped on Shelley's foot. _"We know ALL bout' you and the Little Mastah'!"_

Obviously, Gaignun blinked again, furrowing his brow slightly at the mentioning of his brother. "What _about_ me and the Little Master?" the black-haired chairman countered with a glint of exasperation in his voice. Nobody on screen was making any sense, though Gaignun was starting to feel a _little_ enlightened after hearing _Jr.'s_ mentioning. _Terrific. What's Rubedo up to THIS time?_ Jr. may be the oldest, but there was no denying the fact that, on occasion, Jr. enjoyed acting the age his form mimicked. Right now, Gaignun was too tired to put-up with his brother's shenanigans. Sighing, Gaignun ran a hand through his jet-black hair. "What has he done _now_?" he asked, for once upholding his charade and _sounding_ like Jr.'s parent.

"_Oh, don't put all tha' blame on HIM!"_ Mary continued to rant up a storm. _"Ya're no saint in this eitha', so don't ya DARE beat around tha' bush!"_

"Mary, I _honestly_ did not know what you are talking about at the moment," Gaignun reassured whole-heartedly. He did not understand a word Mary spoke, nor was Gaignun willing to let any nonsense ensue. He was a wise and strong enough leader to know how to handle his subordinates before pandemonium let loose. "I'm not being 'coy,' and I certainly am not 'blaming' anyone. Unfortunately, if you are expecting me to 'explain' something, I first must know _what_ needs explaining."

Gaignun did not even have to use his inherent U.R.T.V. powers for his words to simmer Mary's rage. For a moment, Mary glanced away from Gaignun, turning to face Shelley. The sisters appeared to have spoken a few words, all unheard from Gaignun's end. Just when he was about to speak again, Shelley stepped forward, politely holding her hands in front of herself to address her leader.

"_Master Gaignun,"_ softly began Shelley, sounding far more composed than Mary, who impatiently yanked at a blonde curl for lack of anything better to do. _"Please excuse my directness. However, it has come to our attention that you and Little Master have done something which may jeopardize the reputation of the Kukai Foundation."_

Naturally, Gaignun's first guess regarded the Conflict. However, he and Helmer ensured that upon the establishment of the foundation, Rubedo and Nigredo's pasts would be buried from legal eyes. The odds of anyone unearthing the truth about Gaignun Kukai and his "son" were slim, solely because Helmer protected those truths. Thus, whatever this "something" was which might "jeopardize" the foundation, it could _not_ have to do with what happened fourteen and a half years ago.

So then, _what_ was Shelley talking about? "And what might that 'something' be, Shelley?" inquired Gaignun, leaning back in his chair to fold his arms across his chest. Shelley and Mary Godwin were two of the most trustworthy people Gaignun knew. They respected Master Gaignun enough to not bother him for foolishness. Thus, if the women claimed there was a problem, they were not joking. Mary _was_ the playful type, but _Shelley_ would not fool around. "Tell me what's going on."

There was a silent pause from Shelley, before she glanced away momentarily to her sister. Mary still looked ready to pummel a few heads, and the 100-Series were still bawling. Out of everyone on the bridge, Shelley was the most composed, meaning she would have to divulge the news to Gaignun. Of course, that did not mean Shelley was exempt from the utter shock of the revelation that rapidly engulfed the _Durandal_. Shelley just preferred to be less public with her emotions.

"_Master Gaignun,"_ Shelley started again, slowly looking back at the man's screen. _"We know about your relations with Little Master. Please do not consider this condemnation, but in the best interest of the foundation, we must insist that you take immediate precautions before the government finds out. All of us at the foundation respect your privacy and orientation, but we also fear government officials may not be as kind. For these reasons, we suggest-"_

"Wait. Wait a minute," Gaignun interrupted, raising a hand to silence Shelley's sentence. As if the man did not have enough questions regarding this transmission, now Shelley's current speech added on _another_ zillion questions to the roster. What did Shelley mean by his "relations with Little Master"? Plus, one could not forget the "privacy and _orientation_" line Shelley so bluntly added. _What in God's name are they talking about?!_ Gaignun knew what Shelley meant by "relations" and "orientation," but…_with Little Master?!_ Surely, there must be some misunderstanding _somewhere_. "Ladies, you will have to forgive me but I _still_ don't know what you are talking about-"

_"That makes TWO of us, dammit!"_ Gaignun heard his older brother's eloquent voice suddenly pipe-up off camera.

- - - - - - -

Back on the _Durandal_, Jr. had just stepped out of his room after a nice long nap. He was feeling refreshed and rip-raring to continue his duties with his recharged optimism. With Alby on his heels, the redhead returned to the bridge to relieve Shelley and Mary of their appreciated services, until…

…Until he got bombarded with half-a-dozen teary-eyed 100-Series inundating him on the bridge's lift, all blubbering "we'll _always _love you, Little Master, no matter _who _you are!"

Safe to say, after tearing away the last blue-haired Realian, the baffled Little Master raised an eyebrow alongside a prolonged "O-kaaay…" For the life of him, Jr. could not figure out _why_ half of those flushed 100-Series muttered under their breaths, "I wish I were Master Gaignun."

Clearing his throat, Jr. straightened out his red trench coat before ascending the captain's platform where Mary and Shelley were currently conversing with, speak of the devil, Master Gaignun. Had the situation been any different, Jr. would have brightened at being able to see his long-lost little brother again. Unfortunately, after getting serenaded by a bunch of weepy 100-Series, never mind all the _looks_ crewmembers gave him during his trip to the bridge… "Anyone care to explain what the hell's goin' on here?"

Dramatically scrunching her face, Mary snarled angrily before stomping over to the Little Master's standing point. Using the height difference to her advantage, the younger Godwin bore her enraged blue eyes down into Jr., causing the redhead to blink and hesitantly step back once. "Now, I've got _nothin'_ against you and Mastah' Gaignun bein'…_yaselves_," for lack of a better word, naturally causing Jr. to blink strangely. "But you two are smart enough ta' know that this has _'scandal'_ written all ova' it! Ya' _government affiliates_ for God's sake! If this gets out-"

"Okay…lemmie try this again…" Jr. intervened, raising a hand to silence Mary much as his brother did with Shelley a moment ago. Whatever Mary rambled had long since garbled around in Jr.'s head and became mush. He did not even know _where_ to begin regarding Mary's rant. Once more with emphasis, "_What the hell_ is going on here?"

Knowing it was futile to get through the Little Master's stubborn skull, Mary about-faced and stomped right back to Gaignun's holographic image. "Is _this_ why you've been hidin' out on Fifth Jerusalem so long?!" Mary wondered, causing Master Gaignun to blink in unprecedented confusion. "I shoulda' _known_ there was somethin' fishy goin' on!"

Just as perplexed as Jr., Gaignun kept struggling to decipher whatever Mary and the others thought was 'going on' between the Kukais. Judging by the exasperated look displayed on Jr.'s face, it was obvious to Gaignun that his older brother was _just_ as lost. Gaignun did not want to pry the truth from the women via his powers, but he would if he _had_ to in order to settle this asinine problem.

Fortunately, just before Gaignun could initiate his powers, humming resonated from the _Durandal's_ bridge. Jointly, everyone on the bridge turned around to see two newcomers ascend the lift, none other than a blonde cyborg and a pink-haired Realian. As if this afternoon was not crazy enough, Jr. was mind-boggled to see _MOMO_ on his ship (and he was raring to blast whoever the hell conveniently forgot to tell Jr. she arrived!). Genuinely, Jr. was happy to see her so suddenly after six months. Alas, before he could properly welcome the girl, the redhead could not shake the odd tension across the bridge, never mind notice how strange MOMO looked upon her arrival. The Realian was usually perky and animated, but today her gaze was down on her blue boots. "MOMO?"

The second she heard his voice, MOMO jumped slightly upon noticing the congregation on the bridge, specifically Jr. _and_ Mr. Gaignun's projected portrait. It was different to see the two men together, now, after she unearthed their little secret. MOMO could not help but feel awkward, as if she was imposing them. Shyly, the young girl kept her gaze on her boots as she and Ziggy stepped off the red lift. Unable to make her reunion with Jr. any more pleasant, MOMO decided to keep quiet.

As if everyone _else_ on the bridge did not bewilder Jr. enough, MOMO's debut baffled the redhead all over again. Why did she look so shy? Ziggy was perpetually serious and unreadable, but MOMO was always emotional and full of life. Seeing her so downcast instinctively worried Jr. and coerced him to approach the pink-haired prototype. When her head skittishly turned away upon feeling Jr.'s hand on her shoulder, _that_ was when the red flags soared. Something was _definitely_ wrong.

"MOMO?" Jr. started softly, gently massaging her shoulder in hopes of encouraging her to face him. "Come' on. Please tell me what's wrong." _SOMEBODY better damn-well start explaining this, _lest Jr. go out of his mind.

He sounded so concerned, so sweet…there was no doubt in MOMO's mind that Jr. deserved the truth. Just as the Little Master hoped, MOMO finally spun back around to him…though instead collided with him so instantly Jr. almost fell backwards. Once again, a 100-Series Realian bombarded him, throwing her arms around his neck and causing Jr. to step back again to keep his balance. After regaining himself, the redhead placed his hands on MOMO's shoulders, loosely holding her whilst unsure if he should return her hug. It was not that he _minded_ hugging her, but…_why_ were they hugging?!

"Oh, Jr.!" MOMO screeched, enough to make the redhead jump before she parted enough to face him straight-on. "It's okay, really! As long as you're happy, _I'm_ happy! We'll figure out a way that you and your brother can live happily together, I swear!"

"Huh?!" Jr. blinked incredulously, trying to comprehend what the girl just told him. "What do you mean 'a way Gaignun and I can live happily together'?! We _are_ happy together!"

Jr. did not think he said anything _too_ offensive, and yet from the farthest corner of the bridge he heard another blue-haired 100-Series howl out another defeated wail. "Will somebody _please_ tell me what's going on?!" he begged the rest of the crew, turning to his right where Ziggy stood nearest. For once in his life, Jr. was hoping Mr. Numbers-and-Battle-Strategies would provide the direct clear-cut answer Jr. sought. "Old man, _please_ tell me you've got an explanation for this!"

Frankly, Ziggy did not think _he_ was the one who needed to do some explaining around here. However, the cyborg was content living under the assumption that he had no right to pry any information out of Jr. regarding the redhead's 'relations' with Master Gaignun. _However_, "Listen, what you do with your brother is _your_ business," Ziggy bluntly answered, before taking a step closer and pointing a mechanical finger at the still-perplexed Jr. "But if I find out you do _anything_ like that with MOMO, you _WILL_ regret it," he threatened in a deep, booming voice, tightening his mechanical fist as a not-so-friendly reminder of the cyborg's brute strength. "_Understood_?"

Frankly, Jr. did not understand _anything_ anymore. _Fantastic! The old man's gone senile, and the rest of my crew's lost their freakin' minds!_ Then again, Jr. was wondering if _he_ was the one losing his mind. The Little Master was getting dangerously close to losing what little patience he already possessed.

On the other hand, Ziggy's words _did_ strike a few cords in Jr. "Wait a sec', what do you mean 'what my brother and I do is our business'?" Come to think of it, this was not the first time Gaignun was mentioned. The 100-Series muttered his name, then MOMO said something about him and Jr. being 'happy together,' never mind what Mary was ranting earlier. Were people getting some weird impression regarding Jr. and Gaignun? Did he _really_ want to even ask, "What the hell do you _think_ we're doing?!"

Dead silence hung heavy across the _Durandal's_ bridge, before MOMO mustered the courage to answer. She _was_, after all, responsible for Jr. and Gaignun's secret being discovered, so MOMO would have to be the one to explain the matter. Pursing her lips nervously, the pink-haired Realian parted completely from Jr., stepping in front of him and lifting her eyes to meet his. Jr. looked so confused, and MOMO did not want to worry him anymore than necessary. At the very least, aside gifts and rescues, MOMO _could_ give Jr. the truth.

"Jr., I'm sorry, but…" MOMO started with an apology, before wringing her hands like towels behind her back. "…I overheard you talking a few hours ago in your bedroom. I know I was rude, and there's no excuse for it. But…I want you to know that what I heard…_doesn't_ change my opinion of you at all! _Really_!" she reassured, before drawing closer and affectionately squeezing Jr. tightly. She did not know if her embrace triggered any feelings inside Jr. like it did for her, but if Jr. was happy then MOMO could be happy for him. "Actually, I'm very happy for you, Jr.! Mommy once told me few people get to experience 'true love,' but if you can find it then that makes you one of the 'luckiest people in the world'!" In a way, MOMO _knew_ her mother's adage was true, since MOMO felt _very_ lucky to have met Jr.

Jr. read about that adage once, too. Unfortunately, he failed to see what the hell that proverb had to do with _this moment_! "MOMO…I _still_ don't know what you're talking about," Jr. replied in an exhausted voice. How was it possible that so many people told him things, and yet Jr. was more confused than before he arrived on the bridge? Maybe he _was_ losing his mind!

"…_I overheard you talking a few hours ago in your bedroom."_

Well, maybe Jr. was not losing it _completely_, since he managed to piece together a few more clues from MOMO's words. "Wait a minute…" he muttered, feeling as though some miraculous light bulb _finally_ clicked on inside his head. "When I was talking in my bedroom…" he remembered, recollecting his conversation with Alby about Gai-

_Oh shit._

In that split second, _everything_ made sense.

"When I was talking in my bedroom…" Jr. repeated, feeling the bridge area suddenly get _very_ warm as his thoughts lingered back to his and Alby's chat. As the puzzle finally completed, piece-by-piece, Jr. felt his heart pound faster and faster as a _very_ disturbing reality-check crept through his veins. His blue eyes widening in realization, the bridge suddenly felt like it was spinning. If MOMO's arms were not still around Jr., the Little Master's wobbling legs would have given way. "…Oh God…" Jr. gulped loudly, while he attempted to keep his thoughts as steady as possible. "…I was talking about…_Gaignun_!"

Overjoyed that _somebody_ finally admitted the truth, Mary sighed in utmost relief. "_Finally_!" she exclaimed in a huff of oxygen. "It's about time you admitted it-!"

_"Admit WHAT, Rubedo?!"_ Master Gaignun's voice suddenly blared through the bridge's speakers, causing everyone, his infamous brother included, to cringe. Gaignun Kukai was not known for losing his temper like Jr., but that did not mean Nigredo had any qualms about putting his unruly brother in his place when needed. More over, considering his workload on Fifth Jerusalem, Gaignun did _not_ have time for Jr.'s nonsense! _"What have you been up to-?"_

"Alright, everybody take it easy!" Jr. hollered, finally parting from MOMO and raising his hands defensively as the bridge's occupants bore down on the Little Master. True, Jr. had his episodes of mischief, but today was no such case. His brother's particular glare did not aid Jr., either. Despite Nigredo being the younger brother, he still possessed the older, better-built, more _intimidating_ body, and Gaignun was _not_ afraid to use it, either. Jr. was very strong for his size, but one could not deny that there _were_ stronger physical perks to an adult body. Plus, for Rubedo, it was outright _humiliating_ for the crap to be beaten out of _him_ by his _younger_ brother. The embarrassment alone was _worse_ than any roughhousing Nigredo could muster, and the black-haired brother knew it, too. _Jeez, this is going from bad to worse._

"Argh!" moaned Jr., before taking a few steps and running a hand through his red hair. How the hell could he explain this? When in doubt, Jr. preferred to be direct, and now was no different. "Look…uh…when I was in my room, I _was_ talking about Gaignun…" he clarified, before swallowing upon noticing the murderous glint in his brother's teal eyes. "…Gaignun…our _cat_!"

As if another light blub clicked, the angry glint in Gaignun's eyes vanished with a blink. Right then and there, _everything_ made sense for Nigredo. _"Our…cat?!"_

"Your CAT?!" everybody else exclaimed across the bridge, causing Jr. to cringe at the echoing pitch in everyone's voices.

"Yes, my cat, _okay_?!" Jr. exasperatedly exhaled. "Dammit, my brothers and I had a cat when we grew up! His name was Gaignun and _that_ was the 'Gaignun' I was talking about in my room!"

It did not take a genius to assume _that_ 'Gaignun' also happened to be the source of inspiration for Rubedo and Nigredo's Kukai names. As the news absorbed into Mary, Shelley, and the rest of the bridge's crewmembers, multiple _more_ light bulbs clicked, alongside various "ohs" and "I sees." All of the blue-haired 100-Series girls breathed _tremendous_ sighs of relief, nearly stampeding back to their beloved Little Master before the redhead suddenly needed to sit down at a nearby terminal.

Everyone else blinked in curiosity as Jr. felt an enormous headache and nausea creep into him upon realizing one _other_ tidbit of enlightenment. "Shit…don't tell me you all thought I was talking about…" Jr. could not bear to look up at his younger brother's face, lest the redhead promptly vomit upon putting two-and-two together. All those things he said before; innocent recollections of his cat _sleeping with_ him, _cuddling_ him, _licking_ him… "Dammit, I'm gonna' be sick."

"Oh Jr., I'm _so sorry_!" MOMO cried out, rushing over to the very pale, _very_ ill looking Little Master. Placing her hands on his slouched shoulders, the prototype apologetically dipped her face, not that Jr. could tell with his own head between his legs. "I didn't know you had a cat, _honest_ I didn't!" How in heaven's name was MOMO to know that Jr. and his brothers once owned a cat that just-so-happened to _also_ be called 'Gaignun'?! Judging by the enlightened expressions on everyone else's faces, MOMO was not the only one unaware of 'Gaignun the cat.' Even Mary and Shelley looked stunned, and the women knew the U.R.T.V. brothers for _much_ longer than MOMO. "I'm so sorry, Jr.!"

Despite the mayhem that her innocence triggered, Jr. knew MOMO was not entirely at fault. "It's…alright," he muttered, still fighting the urge to spill his guts over the mental picture of him and his baby brother doing…if Jr. kept thinking this way he _would_ hurl. "There's no way you could've known, MOMO," he replied, still not looking up at her but willing to raise a hand to one of hers on his shoulders. Patting her hand reassuringly, "It was simple misunderstanding. I'm not mad at you." Frankly, Jr. was pissed at _himself_ for being stupid enough to a.) talk loud enough to himself for others to overhear, and b.) for not telling others about his cat sooner. Jr. could only imagine how many _other_ times he innocently mentioned Gaignun, the cat, and provoked innocent listeners to think he was talking about his brother. Fortunately, Jr. rarely mentioned his cat, but…now he was getting paranoid. He really only had himself to blame for this mix-up.

"So then…lemmie see if I've got this straight…" Mary suddenly voiced, folding her arms across her chest as she pondered. "You and Mastah' Gaignun neva' did…"

"_NEVER_, and that's _final_, got it?!" Jr. exclaimed, shooting his head up at her and cutting the blonde off before Mary finished her question. Just thinking about how she might word the rest of her question made Jr.'s stomach churn all over again. Technically, the U.R.T.V. brothers shared a bed when they were very little but…_it wasn't like THAT, dammit!_ Jr. cursed himself for even _thinking_ that way. Burying his head all over again, Jr. groaned, "Urgh…I feel sick."

Mary, on the other hand, felt very relieved. "Well, glad' that's all cleared up!" she chirped with a clap of her hands, never noticing her sister's exasperated glare before the blonde spun back around to face Master Gaignun. The black-haired chairman was looking minutely pale, himself, though less dramatically than his moaning brother. Bouncing back to her typical demeanor, Mary flashed Gaignun a smile, a dire contrast to how she looked ready to massacre him a while ago. "I shoulda' _known_ what turns _you_ on, Mastah' Gaignun," she winked coquettishly, sparking a minute trail of redness on her master's cheeks upon the implication. Nudging Shelley's arm, Mary chuckled, "Afta' all, Shelley and I already have known your orientation many _many_ times, _haven't_ we sis?"

"_Waaay_ too much information, Mary!" Jr. screamed from across the bridge, his face a perpetual dilemma of turning red with embarrassment or green with nausea. Like Ziggy, Jr. believed whatever the hell went on behind closed doors should _stay_ there, especially when it regarded his brother's sex life! "God, do you _want_ me to throw up?!

Hardly standing to see Jr. like this, MOMO carefully removed her arms from his shoulders, before folding her hands modestly in front of herself like Shelley. Dipping her head again, MOMO blinked back a few guilty tears before apologizing again. "I feel terrible, Jr.," she admitted openly, biting her lip to prevent the tears from overpowering her. MOMO doubted she had any right to cry at a moment like this, despite the torturous guilt eating away inside her. Clamping her eyes shut, the Realian lowered her head further so her pink bangs shielded her eyes from potential emotion. "I'm so sorry-!"

Her eyes did not remain shut for long before they flew back open. Right in front of her line of vision was her hands, now accompanied by an additional pair gently encompassing them. MOMO knew who the hands belonged to, and doubted she deserved anymore of his kindness. Turning away, the little Realian swallowed a lump in her throat, squeaking out a "Jr.…"

"Hey, I said I'm not mad," Jr.'s voice resounded as MOMO felt something suddenly cup her chin and cause her to unwillingly look back down at the sitting redhead. Despite still looking a little pale, there was a gentle smile on Jr.'s face, backing up his statement and melting away MOMO's guilt. His smile alone made the Realian's heart flutter and a smile tease her own pink lips. "Don't worry about it. I'll go around the ship and explain what happened," because it was damn obvious everyone _else_ on the _Durandal_ must have heard about the 'Gaignun mix-up.' "Fortunately, I can be pretty convincing when I want to be," he cunningly grinned, allowing his other free hand to linger down towards one of his holstered pistols.

Gaignun and the Godwins rolled their eyes from their vantage points, while MOMO stifled a giggle. Feeling better, the pink-haired girl nodded eagerly. "Okay, but I'm going with you, too," she insisted, much to Jr.'s surprise. "_I _should be the one to tell everyone the truth. I'll own up to my mistake and make sure to explain it to everyone."

Now was one of those moments where Juli Mizrahi would have been very proud of her daughter. Frankly, Jr. felt a little proud of MOMO, himself. "Fair enough," the redhead nodded, before guiding MOMO towards the bridge lift. "While we're at it, how about I tell you more about Gaignun? …My _cat_…" the redhead winked with a chuckle. "Just so no more 'misunderstandings' crop up."

Giggling again, MOMO nodded affirmatively. "Okay. I'd like that."

- - - - - - -

Later that night, back in solitude of Jr.'s suite…

"Damn. I'm glad that's settled," sighed the redhead as he reclined in his desk's chair, folding his arms behind his back and pleased to relax again. It felt like forever since Jr. took that afternoon nap, which was actually only a few hours ago. Of course, after the 'Gaignun mix-up,' Jr. was ready for _another_ nap…or a nice stiff drink.

_"How many times have I told to be careful with that stuff?"_ his younger brother's voice echoed from the desk's holographic transmission screen, once again displaying Gaignun's portrait. Now with the cat business out of the way, the U.R.T.V. brothers could finally enjoy a pleasant conversation over drinks.

Narrowing his blue eyes at his obnoxious little brother, Jr. chose to shrug off Gaignun's scolding and pour himself shot of liquor. "_Who's_ the older brother here?" Jr. matter-of-factly challenged before raising his glass to the screen for a semi-toast. "Hmmm, _little_ brother?"

Narrowing his teal eyes right back across the screen, Gaignun countered _"Who's also the one in a twelve-year-old's body?" _he retorted before raising his own glass. _"Know your limits, Rubedo. I don't think it would kill you to act your age ONCE in a while."_

"You're taking that 'adoptive father' charade a little _too_ seriously, Gaignun," snorted Jr. before lowering his glass and frowning. "And where the hell did you get the idea that I don't know my limits?"

Knowing that was a loaded question, Gaignun quickly took a swing of his liquor, dodging the bullet. After swallowing the drink, the black-haired brother then rapidly changed the subject._ "Well, like you said, it's good to know that ordeal was rectified. With the Federation in a frenzy after the sighting of Abel's Ark, political sex scandals would not be taken lightly right now."_

Shivering at the disturbing thought, Jr. nodded whole-heartedly. "Tell me about it," he replied with an incredulous raise of his eyebrows. The Kukai Foundation might have gotten into a _lot_ of trouble if the Gaignun mix-up escalated into government ears. Fortunately, everything was clarified. Not taking chances, Jr. and Gaignun covered the incident with Helmer, just to let him know in advance about the misunderstanding in the event word somehow spread outside the foundation. Naturally, Helmer had a good laugh, and fortunately, now Jr. and Gaignun could look back on the situation and laugh with him.

Even so, "But _jeez_…I figured people would know us well enough by _now_!" Jr. scoffed, being mindful not to gesture too animatedly lest he spill the drink still in his hand. "I know dumbass rumors flew before about you cloning yourself and me being your illegitimate kid, but _still_…" he huffed with a slightly resentful frown. He certainly was not mad at MOMO for the unintentional rumor. Jr. was actually more disappointed with his own crew for _going along_ with the stupidity. "It makes me wonder what _else_ they think about us."

_"I would not worry about it too much,"_ Gaignun reassured, causing Jr. to perk back up at his brother's face. _"We know the truth. That's all that matters."_

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Jr. nodded modestly, before finally relaxing himself again and at last treating himself to that drink. Regardless of what Gaignun thought, Jr. _did_ know his alcohol limits, and drank only a little at a time. One shot glass would not affect him _too_ much. Swallowing the burning liquid and licking any access liquor on his lips, the redhead then felt a wicked little smirk pull his lips. "As if I'd sleep with _you_."

Jr. was only teasing, not that Gaignun was the type to let his older brother get away with even the smallest of insults. Fortunately, Nigredo was smart enough to know how to break even. Finishing his own drink, Gaignun then refrained from showcasing the grin that teased his own lips. Despite being the most serious of the Variants, Nigredo could occasionally play around just like Rubedo.

"To be honest, though," Jr. continued, taking one more sip of his drink before continuing. "I'm kinda' surprised you're not angrier, considering this fiasco interrupted whatever the hell it is you've been up to on Fifth Jerusalem."

Technically, Jr. was right, but Gaignun was not the type to 'blow his gasket' like the redhead whenever plans went to hell. _"I figured it must have been SOME misunderstanding," _Gaignun confessed knowingly. Unfortunately, that lurking grin kept seducing Gaignun that it was almost impossible for him not to crack a smile during, _"Though I have to admit, I originally assumed everyone just had mistaken the incident between you and I for you and Albedo."_

"Oh," Jr. shrugged, innocently nodding before gulping down the rest of his liquor.

Fortunately for the redhead's young body, the alcohol never reached Jr.'s stomach before realization coerced him to spit out the drink. He briefly choked on the burning liquid, though the burning in his cheeks was caused by something _else_. "WAIT A MINUTE! What the hell is _THAT_ implying, Nigredo?!"

Fortunately for Gaignun's sake, he promptly ended the transmission.

**THE END**

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**A/N**: Hehehehe, that was fun! Truth be told, this was not the easiest one-shot for me to write, since it involved various 'serious' elements. I can't tell you how hard it was for me to write a _comedy_ referencing a cat that tragically died during the Miltian Conflict (*sniff* I have a tender spot for animals). Plus, then we've got Gaignun Kukai's role, which it isn't easy to incorporate nonchalant Nigredo into a comedy, either (neither is Ziggy, though I loved his and MOMO's moments). Still, I hope you enjoyed this. ^_^

So, did you like it? I hope you did. I'd love to know with a review.


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